Why does a Mother mourns over the birth of a girl child?

Gazala Hassan
Now years passed by ,when my cousin sister gave birth to a child. It was her first baby. She was not the only one who was excited about it, but whole family.
The excitement about parenting the first grandchild grew among her parents and in-laws with every passing day. Both the families were getting busier in purchasing sophisticated toys, most comfortable bedding and the best ever cradle for the coming angel.
My cousin was the one for whom a court of caretakers was framed. It comprised everyone in the family from grandmother and grandfather to little other cousins who would also contribute their tender care to my cousin as she was blessed to step in a phase of motherhood. It seemed as if suddenly my cousin had become a queen whose sneezing would also bother everyone in the families.
 She enjoyed all the care and she had all the reasons to do so as everybody would crave for being cared and loved like that. She was the first one in all our prayers. Blessings for the one who had yet to open eyes in this world had started coming from every corner of near and dear ones. She was equally blessed with a caring life partner whose care had also enormously increased. Calling his wife after every fifteen minutes from his office had become a routine. Sometimes we would tease him for doing so and most of the times we would feel slightly jealous about the love and the care. Whenever I met her I would pray for her happiness to last forever.
The days to hold the angel in our arms were approaching nearer. The day came as the little angel was destined to enter this world. It just happened as designed and designed by Almighty. She gave birth to a child-A girl child!
I remember how she uttered and asked me while she was half unconscious-"what is it?" I placed my hand on her forehead, smiled and told her, “You have given birth to a sweet and cute doll.  Your daughter is just like a fairy." She did not answer. Instantly tears gushed out of her eyes and she held her tongue beneath her teeth so tightly that it started bleeding and she went unconscious. I could feel the indifference and was left shattered .Once I came out of the ward I found everybody consoling each other. As if it was not a birth but a death. "This is destiny, what can be done now, accept it…"It was a melancholic scene .All the excitement vanished somewhere in the air. I was disheartened and speechless to see all this. It came like a bullet which hit me hard on both-heart to feel and mind to think. I strived to control my furious temper. Had I not succeeded in doing so I would have simply lost the sense of regarding elders in a public place-hospital!
I left the place. On way back to my home I was left with only question. I did not bother to question the callous approach of everybody else except my cousin. What kept me haunting was my cousin's response to her daughter's birth? I was restless. My peace of mind was stolen. My logic was not coming to my rescue. I was left forlorn as far as my emotional existence as a woman is concerned. I say 'woman' because our society has failed to treat woman as a human created by Almighty so far.
Days passed by and now what flashed before my eyes was quite different story. The little sweet angel was being carried in the arms of her mother (my cousin), she sung sweetest lullabies for her child and kissed her frequently when her daughter felt asleep. To me it was hypocrisy. Hypocrisy by a mother for her own daughter! Today I could not resist from telling her that how come she was concerned about her daughter as her birth had shattered all her dreams of having a son. I assured my cousin that it would be me who would tell her daughter once she becomes mature the callous approach of her mother during her birth. She perhaps did not take me very serious and took it in lighter vein.
Again the law of nature was intact thus the time passed by. This however did not wane away the haunting experience from my mind. With every passing day I frequently kept asking myself "Why a woman does not want to give birth to a girl child, despite being woman?"
As goes the saying; 'Time is the best healer'. I would add to it, it's equally the best master which has its peculiar way of teaching the lessons of life. With time I faced more realities rather cruelties of life .I encountered with miserable times which woman had to pass through. I saw how she was treated inside families and what all she confronted with.
She is influenced by the patriarchal system so much so that she has herself become a tool in this set-up without recognizing it. She has failed to break the age old silence and raise voice against injustice.
 She was being exploited in the name of 'Woman emancipation', so much so that a mother was indifferent and biased towards her own daughter. How she was deprived of the essence of her whole existence. Does she stop to live like a daughter; rather chose’s to be ‘would be’ or mere daughter in law of some family.
Indeed the turbulence, exploitation, miseries, indifferences, slavery she faces at the hands of social, cultural and political fronts is the reasons and thus a big question to our so called Islamic society. Islam gives her an eloquent status, but religious teachings are not properly implemented. This is the reason why woman does not want a girl child despite being herself a woman. This is the reality which was unfolded before me and it is possible to explore more in the coming days.
The Prophet said, “Woman prevails over the wise, while ignorant men prevail over her; for in them the fierceness of the animal is imminent.
Woman is a ray of God; she is not the earthly beloved.
She is creative: you might say she is not created."
I wonder is this thought of Maullana Rumi, the mystic poet, ever understood!